Zine 33: Kandisha
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Intro:
To borrow a lyric from the Wombats; “I like the way your brain works...I like the way you turn me inside and out.” It may be from a love song but in my post teenage angst adoration for fitting lyrics in places they weren’t meant, it’s exactly how I feel about the Atlanta to LA musician. Mere moments into chatting with her, the passion behind engineering seems a little more clear to this STEM inefficient brain. The more she gave me her thoughts, the more I wanted to know what churned and burned to get there. Kandisha makes you want to see the sketches just as much as the final piece. The first song I listened to was ‘Ride in which Kandisha turns the gen z whisper into a baddie; a trait common to her sound. Her projects are laden with popular trends turned on their heads. With a confident cadence and purpose behind her angelic vocals, she manages to blend the last three decades of R&B, pop and hip-hop in under a few minutes. And I know what you’re thinking, ‘okay but those are three genres very commonly grouped together,’ and you’re right. But that’s why Kandisha stands out even more. In a revolution of genre fusion, Kandisha isn’t sticking them in a bottle and shaking until creamy. Her sound isn’t one mood you sink into, but a journey you release yourself into. The only comparison I can think of is movie trailers; the best moments compactly and cohesively strung together to take you from point A to point B and still leave room for interpretation play. And let’s be honest, trailers are the best part of going to the movies. Xoxo, Baby Ballou
Message conversation:
Bb: I actually found you through a friend, Disco Shrine, when she showed me the music video you danced in and your energy was 🔥 and when I went to stalk your insta, I found your music and was like oh shit THIS is 🔥🔥🔥 is music your primary art form and what others are there?
Kandisha: That’s so cool! Thankyou!! Music is for sure what I spend the most time on. I dropped out of fashion school when I wanted to style and creative direct. Since changing courses, learning music has consumed most of my life lol
Bb: Oh interesting, had music been in your life before that as a side thing or did you fully start it post fashion school?
Kandisha: Fashion was really a way for me to avoid the courage it took to pursue music. I come from a family of musicians, so it always was inside of me and truly what I wanted to do. I just didn’t know if I could ever be as talented as my siblings, so I let insecurity get the best of me for some time.
Bb: Oof I feel that. Sometimes influence can become a shadow. My dad hasn’t written a piece of work in decades but I still consider him the primary writer of the family just from that mega image of his talent I’d compare myself to growing up. What was the catalyst, what got you the courage you needed?
Kandisha: Exactly! Comparison is such a distraction from your truth. I ended up moving to Atlanta to get further into creative direction. As the first small resurgence of female rappers was happening, people kept assuming I was one. Friends wanted to write for me. I didn’t want that, but I took it as God just nudging me to honor my purpose. So I started learning. Atlanta is definitely where I found myself and was embraced for who I was for the first time, so it helped.
Bb: I’ve seen some alt femme videos on tiktok where they say people always assume they’re a rapper when they actually are __blank__ genre, and while you are a rapper. Did you find people assumed that because of a vibe or energy, or at times was it almost stereotyping even though apt?
Kandisha: I think people thought that mostly cause that’s the thing to be in Atlanta. Atlanta is the modern center of hip hop!
Bb: So once you’d decided to learn yourself, how did you approach songwriting? your lines are amazing, I would’ve guessed you’d grown up making up raps or poems like a diary.
Kandisha: Thankyou so much! I spend the most time on writing so it means a lot. Growing up I was good at writing, but I hadnt channeled it artistically yet. I’d grown up with an equal appreciation for pop, rap, and rock music. So I knew I wanted to be able to understand songwriting as well as I could rap. Rapping is like math class to me. I can learn all the formulas and use the ones that fit me. Songwriting feels more like science class. Never ending discovery. I’m able to find sparks in many places from classical music to foreign languages. I can relay those discoveries back to my raps. I feel like I’m creating my own songwriting science and taking the longer route to becoming what’s considered a good writer, but my goal is to be one of the best.
Bb: Wow that was so compelling. I mean, I’m not kidding when I say basic math eludes me but I love that wording of learning all the formulas and taking what satiates you best. It sounds more like you’re a living spark and the world has dampened itself in gasoline to ready for your arrival. How does inspiration hit? With wodie, for example, did you work on a concept for a while, was it a verse or line that popped in your head, etc?
Kandisha: Thank you!! I surely hope so! Wodie came about just because I like the word and wanted challenge myself to see if I could intentionally write a universally catchy hook. I used to study jingles lol I was also rekindling a relationship at the time, and wanted to write a song for him.
Bb: Wow, you’ve literally studied everything huh that’s so cool. I love the way your brain works. What’s one of the weirdest or unexpected places you’ve found inspiration or something to take to your music?
Kandisha: Hardly!! Still learning so much! The weirdest place might be one of my first songs. It was about a dream I’d had about a stripper that the devil wanted to take home for himself but couldn’t have. Kinda like how guys try to get at you on the street...but mystical. He said something like “if heaven had strip clubs, you’d still work for the King Of Diamonds”. From there I wrote it from both the perspective of the devil trying to lure her and the stripper resisting the spell. Haha funny to say years later, now that Lil Nas did a similar concept for his video!
Bb: Ooo interesting, would you say a lot of your songs are written from character perspectives, your own or fifty fifty?
Kandisha: Fifty fifty! I think...But pure objectivity is hard to accomplish in life even if a story is fictional.
Bb: I’m obsessed with that last sentence. Tell me about some characters you’ve written from the perspective of?
Kandisha: I used to write from men’s perspective a lot. I liked to pitch down my voice and experiment. Sometimes I’ll listen to story telling podcasts and feel it out from there. But they’re less identifiable characters, and more of emotional entities that may or not belong to me.
Bb: Ooo when I wrote fiction stories growing up, they were always from a guys perspective. For me personally, I think I hadn’t been exposed to female characters like the ones I wanted to write. Only male ones were chaotic and messy in a gross way that I related to. I had to unlearn that. Obviously, that’s just my personal experience. Why do you think you were drawn to a different perspective.
Kandisha: Men are definitely giving more broadly written characters, I completely feel that! For me, I think it’s because, growing up, the rappers bouncing the way I liked were mostly men, so I didn’t know how to say some of the things the way I wanted as myself. But ultimately, I just want my art be able to reach many types of people.
Bb: With social media and pop culture today, we have the most amount of commercial artists at one time plus all the underground and independent musicians. It’s the era of the niche, everyone can find the most specific and obscure sound they want. How does that affect how you make music if at all. Because reaching many types of people is both easier but I feel like it’s almost a decision of a devoted fan base for niche community or facing inconsistencies/larger risk jumping for a wider net
Kandisha: That’s something that I struggled with. I was originally making a lot more experimental sounds. Very niche. Then I listened to people’s opinions on what I should be doing and tried to simplify. I realize now that authenticity speaks an unwritten language that transcends what’s normal. I also realized there’s a way to learn the rules.. or the things that make music more widely accepted, and break them with that language of authenticity. Those are my favorite kind of artists, the ones that push past normal in a relatable enough way that culture moves forward.
Bb: I really like how you take knowledge and subvert it. It’s like that destroy a system from the inside mentality except creation. Ooo this is so random but I’m curious because I like how your brain operates so I’m just genuinely excited to hear your thoughts. There’s kind of two schools of thought, you know destruction is the act of destroying something and then the more ~shiny~ destruction is just another form of creation, which do you gravitate to and why? If either
Kandisha: I love that!! I think that all of creation is already complete. I think that’s the idea of God. If everything is energy, and it can neither be created or destroyed, we’re essentially just molding it. Creation and destruction are just phases...different hues of something already complete. You form a ball of play-doh into a shape, you can smash it, the idea continues to be an idea, the play doh remains, and so does the potential for more ideas. I think that’s what makes art so captivating. It is expression. Expression being the way we mold that play-doh...and exude our truest humanity.
Bb: This is a quick twist but that really reminds me of this poem my dad wrote when he was a kid that I’ve always loved.
“A thought may wither
A thought may lay
A thought may slowly drift away
A thought brought hither
That thought shall stay
That thought shall be there every day.”
How does it feel to surrender yourself to that mentality? To know everything that needs to be, already is and is yours to mold
Kandisha: That’s beautiful! It’s a mentality that empowers me the more i remember it. I know that I can bring about anything I truly believe in. This requires me to take more responsibility for my consciousness and gives my ego a lot of relief.
Bb: Last question, what’s on the horizon for you? Musically, and in the self-growth you aspire.
Kandisha: What’s next should sound more like me than anything I’ve done. Im displaying more versatility, more of my own producing, genre fluidity, and rhythm. As far as my journey, I just plan on being free.